A Black Friday Horror Story

My Dad and I fell for the Black Friday madness.  Twice. 

The first time, 6 AM at the Black Friday shopping mecca … Staples.   

I’ll have you know that we picked up a laminator for the wonderful price of $20.  (Of course, the fact that said laminator is still languishing in its unopened packaging says a lot about this impulse purchase.)  

But the big deal to be had was the 250 MB camera memory cards for $20.  Now you can buy a 2 GB card for $10 and that’s not even including a sale price.  But hey, times were different back then.  

But did we learn our lesson?  Oh no.  We decided that Target was the place to be.

The next year, we loaded up the car at 4:00 AM.  Just Dad and I.  And drove to Target.  When, what to my wondering eyes did appear, a line of people that stretched around the parking lot.   

But undaunted, we parked the car and took our place in the queue.  We stomped and clapped, moving our bodies in an increasingly desperate attempt to stay warm.  The line was still growing, the parking lot still filling.  

Finally the line began to move.  And amazingly, we were among the first group in the store.  Much to the consternation of the individuals who had been waiting in line since the night before.  

We rushed to the back, fighting to remain upright in an increasingly tight pack.  Only to arrive to find … that we weren’t interested in anything that they had to offer.  

The rock-bottom priced movies were gone, the TVs unneeded, but there were plenty of gaming chairs with speakers built in to the headrest.  Didn’t we need one, my father and I asked, the price is fantastic.  No, remember, we don’t play video games.  Oh, right.  But it is such a good deal, maybe we can use it as a dog bed.  No, the dog probably would not care for the chair’s rocking option.  

In the end, we stumbled upon the latest Harry Potter movie.  Not actually on sale.  But still needed to complete our collection.  Success we claimed!

We fought our way back to the front of the store where we, once again, stood in line.  But this time, the moving and clapping was in a pathetic attempt to avoid being trampled by the poor souls still pouring into the store.  Little did they know that the items were gone, the deals missed.  

But wait!  One enterprising gentleman at the front of the line offered to sell his new Black Friday TV for $250 that he had just purchased for $150.  A good deal to be sure and his offer was quickly accepted.  

The beleaguered cashier looked at our movie, then up at us, then back at our movie.  Then, in the most sorrowful voice, announced that we were mistaken.  This movie was not on sale. 

Oh no, we reassured her, we know it’s not on sale.  But we need it anyway so that our trip in the darkest hour of the morning is not in vain.  

We loaded the car, and wrestled through the traffic, attempting to avoid the demolition derby that appear to have taken over the parking lot. 

Once we arrived home, we victoriously carried our package into the house, prepared to announce our success.  Only to discover, a mother still sleeping and sisters who weren’t impressed by our purchase.  

And so ends our Black Friday adventures.

This entry was posted in Random Ramblings, The News, Things that make you go hmmm and tagged , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

One Response to A Black Friday Horror Story

  1. yourothermotherhere says:

    I cannot believe that picture! Unreal.

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